Saturday, 22 August 2009

Penis Envy.

I have a severe case of penis envy at the moment. I love a man’s penis when it is fully erect. I love its silky hardness, its tensile strength and its solid weight. I love its aerodynamic shape which glides through vaginal tissue like a hot knife through butter. I love the way it accelerates like a Ferrari from flaccid to erect, in seconds. I love the way it twitches and pulses on ejaculation.

It is a beautifully engineered piece of equipment. There is nothing in the world quite like it. A dildo, no matter how realistic, does not come close. One could argue that a dildo is always erect, therefore always ready for action, but where is the fun in that? It is the fact that erections are not a permanent state of affairs that make them so special.

If I had a penis I would take regular breaks while at the office to nip to the gents and stroke it into hardness. I would knit it woolly covers to keep it warm in the winter and let it hang out my fly to catch a tan in the summer. I would hang weights off it to strengthen it, and then do penis stands when it was strong enough to support my body weight.

I wish I had a penis…but not if it meant giving up my clit. Nothing is worth that sacrifice.

Friday, 21 August 2009


I never understand why two or more women share one man. If anything men should share a woman, especially a woman who has reached her sexual peak. I am less than two years away from mine and I am already seriously thinking of looking for a younger man for some threesome sex.

My boyfriend is getting on a bit since he hit his mid-thirties—not able to cum three, four times a night like he used to. He is also now too controlled for my liking. He mostly orgasms when he wants to, and not when I want him to. Years ago I had several tricks up my sleeve and could surprise him into cumming at my will; now he knows them all – even the thing I do with my vagina when I am on top.

I do not want to let him go—I love him too much. And a younger man would not have his particular expertise. I just need a boy toy, someone young enough for me to play my tricks on.
My boyfriend is the jealous sort and will not like another man in bed with us. But it is not as if I am asking him to sleep with the other man. I simply want my boyfriend’s expertise and a younger man’s enthusiasm; his supreme control and a younger man’s lack of control; his one or two orgasms and a younger man’s five or six.

Or they could just make a man sandwich with me in the middle as the filling.